Saturday, September 19, 2009

Arr, me hearties! It's International "Talk Like a Pirate" Day, yarr!

Avast, ahoy, an' shiver me timbers! Methinks I be the only one o' me mates who can sing this song. Yarr, 'tis a sad state of affairs, an' one I aim to correct:
Lyrics:
Fifteen men on a dead man's chest
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
Drink and the Devil had done for the rest
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
The mate was fixed by the bosun's pike
The bosun brained with a marlinspike
And cookie's throat was marked belike
It had been gripped by fingers ten
And there they lay, all good dead men
Like break o' day in a boozin' ken
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!

Fifteen men of the whole ship's list
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
Dead and bedamned and the rest gone whist
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
The skipper lay with his nob in gore
Where the scullion's axe his cheek had shore
And the scullion he was stabbed times four
And there they lay, and the soggy skies
Dripped all day long into upstarin' eyes
At murk sunset and at foul sunrise
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!

Fifteen men of 'em stiff and stark
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
Ten of the crew had the murder mark
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
'Twas a cutlass swipe or an ounce of lead
Or a yawin' hole in a battered head
And the scuppers glut with a rottin' red
And there they lay, aye, damn me eyes
All lookouts clapped on paradise
All souls bound just contrariwise
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!

Fifteen men of 'em good and true
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
Every man-jack could'a sailed with old Pew
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
There was chest on chest full o' Spanish gold
With a ton of plate in the middle hold
And the cabins riot of loot untold
And there lay they that had took the plumb
With sightless glare and their lips struck dumb
While we shared all by the rule of thumb
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!

More was seen through the sternlight screen
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
Chartings no doubt where a woman had been
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
A flimsy shift on a bunker cot
With a thin dirk slit in the bosom spot
And the lace stiff dry in a purplish blot
Oh, was she wench, some shudderin' maid
That dared the knife and took the blade
By god, she was stuff for a plucky jade
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!

Fifteen men on a dead man's chest
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
Drink and the devil had done for the rest
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
We wrapped 'em all in a mainsail tight
With twice-ten turns of a hawser's bight
And we heaved 'em over and out of sight
With a Yo-Heave-Ho, and a Fare-Ye-Well
And a sudden plunge in the sullen swell
Ten fathoms deep on the road to Hell
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!

D'arr, hyarr! Drink up, ye scurvy scallywags! An' just fer fun, a blast from me past:

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